I’m struggling quite a lot at the moment. I’ve recently started Amitriptyline, as well as increasing my Escitalopram, and for the first week I basically slept all the time. I’m still getting bouts of despair and severe depression, and spending a lot of time stuck in bed. Pain is down but dizziness, brain fog and problems walking are up. One of the casualties of all this has been my ability to write in detail about the subjects that I want to. Actually focussing on the detail is a massive problem. I can chat online, but I can’t write proper blog posts.

Some of the things that I really want to write about but can’t include:

  • The possible causes of ME, viral and mental, and the research into them.
  • Visiting a psychiatrist who believes my ME is a mental disease, and asking how I’m supposed to get my depression fixed without my ME being made worse by this idiot.
  • The Welfare Reform bill and the Health and Social Care bill, the problems, and how to fight them.
  • Being accurate in activism; not spreading rumours, and avoiding exaggeration.
  • How the Left and the Right stifle each others speech, or not. (I’ve written this, but can’t finish editing it and write the conclusion.)
  • Report on my experience at an Atos Work Capability Assessment, and Professor Harrington’s latest antics in policing them. (I was declared unfit to work, if you didn’t know.)
  • Discuss human rights.
  • Basing government policy on actual evidence instead of ideology and greed.
Those are just the ones I started writing, never mind the other ones that I haven’t attempted yet. For now, though, blog posts only come out when something prompts my mind to focus enough on one topic so that I HAVE to get the words written.

Author: Latentexistence

The world is broken and I can't fix it because I am broken. I can, however, rant about it all and this is where I do that when I can get my thoughts together. Most of the time you'll find my words on Twitter rather than here though. I sometimes write for Where's The Benefit too.

2 thoughts on “Aaaarrrrrggggghhhhh”

  1. I have a love hate relationship with Amitriptylene. I love it because I can now sleep longer than 4 hours at a time and my pain is more manageable. I hate it because I feel like I have a hangover every morning unless I drink a pint of water before bed and another one immediately on waking. It is a diuretic. You need to drink lots more than you used to. It helps with the muzzy head. I wish it hadn’t taken me 3 months to work that out. I hope my tip helps. I know it’s frustrating now, but you will get used to it.

  2. Hang in there.  The amitriptylene fog does start to lift after a while but I know what a nightmare it can be as my mum’s been on it more than once for pain relief.  Don’t stress about not getting the blogs out – we can all wait!  The one thing most of us have in abundance is time ….

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